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It even smells like an ordinary marriage —the kitchen is busy once again.But it has its own hidden problems, mostly invisible to the naked eye, that make it more tenuous than first marriage.They in fact see it as a sign there’s something wrong with the relationship, as well as with their partner.
“We indulge the illusion that, with the right partner, conflict will be minimal.”Arguments engage in blame and defensiveness.
They destroy everything in their path, pushing partners further apart and keeping them focused on each other.
Ditto if you count as a first marriage its beta version; three decades of a persistently high divorce rate have encouraged couples to test their relationship by living together before getting married.
But even the increasingly common experience of prior cohabitation actually dims the likelihood of marital success.“It’s so counterintuitive,” says Diane Sollee, a family therapist who is director of the Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education.
“It seems obvious that people would be older and wiser, or learn from the mistakes of a failed first marriage.
They believe they would do better next time around.For one of every two of us, certifiable love can be expected to end in tears. Surveys show that for virtually all of us, marriage holds an honored place on our wish list.It’s something we believe is necessary for attaining life happiness.The following is addressed to “Americans.” But these same principles apply in most countries, as well.Please read and glean through the article as it pertains to those considering remarriage, whether American, or not. Perhaps nowhere is our optimism more apparent than in our approach to marriage.And some people are just too narcissistic to admit they had any role in the failure of a prior relationship.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating